2007 Wrap-Up

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
I got engaged. :) And of course before that I fell in love with (or continued falling in love with) J, and was amazed at how I could fall more and more in love with every day that went by.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't make any resolutions last year, because I just felt like anything I resolved would be doomed to fail. This year, however, I need to resolve to eat and live healthier. I need to get my cholesterol down to a healthy range again, and I need to avoid getting diabetes or anything else my Mother had.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My nephew's fiance just gave birth to a little girl a few days ago. :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
I lost my step-grandmother just before Christmas. She was really old and ready to go, so I didn't grieve too much for her, but I did find out in the process that there are still things about my Mother's death to affect me, this time namely having to go to the funeral home where I last saw her for the first time since she died. Death sucks.

5. What countries did you visit?
Only this one.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
A million dollars? To pay off all of my and J's bills, so that he can quit the job he hates. But since I don't play the lottery and I don't have any rich old relatives, that's not going to happen. So I would say - simply enough money to pay all of my bills and maybe even have a little left to save for emergencies.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Christmas morning, because it's when I got my ring. :) I love being engaged, just as much as I always dreamed I would.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Being the woman J needed, and opening myself up enough to accept his love, despite the fears I had to go through at the end of 2006.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I feel like I've failed hugely in the realm of finances, but then again, that's nothing new. I've been broke on and off from the time I moved out of my parents' home in 1988. Sigh. Right now I just keep looking ahead to two years from now, when I can get a home equity loan to pay off a whole heck of a lot of bills. And hoping that I can learn from my past mistakes to keep this situation from ever happening to me again.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No, thank goodness.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Um...nothing really sticks out in my mind. But then again, I don't buy much.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Can I be selfish and say J's? Because he asked me to marry him, which I thought would never happen to me, and I am going to celebrate that everyday for the rest of my life.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Well, the whole media focus on celebrities (namely Britney Spears) is sickening. Do we really need to watch every move she makes? Or any other celebrity, for that matter?

14. Where did most of your money go?
BILLS!!! Namely credit cards.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Hmmm, take one guess! :)

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
I don't listen to new music much, really, but J introduced me to a song that is "our" song, now - You and Me, by Alice Cooper.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? Happier.
b) thinner or fatter? about the same
c) richer or poorer? Poorer, sadly

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Reading. I don't read nearly enough anymore. But to find time to read, I would have to give up Sims time and/or other things I don't want to give up. So really, I guess I need to get better at balancing my free time activities.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Um...
I can't think of anything, really.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Getting engaged, then we went to J's family's house to open presents and have dinner, then we went to my sister's house to see all of her family, show off my ring and have dessert.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?
I was already falling in love when 2007 started, and I fell more and more in love with every day that passed since.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
We watched a lot of good ones before the strike started and we ran out of new episodes, but I think my favorite is one I watched by myself, online - Kid Nation. It sounded like a stupid show, but I got pulled in by the kids. Some of them were so great, and some of them were a huge pain, but mostly they were just kids having fun without their parents around. It was more compelling than it should have been.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No. One guy at work gets on my nerves big time, but I don't hate him or anyone else.

24. What was the best book you read?
Um, I don't remember? See the answer somewhere above about my not reading enough.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Did I discover Wolfmother in 2007? If so, I'll say them. If not, then no one.

26. What did you want and get?
My engagement ring. :) Sorry if you're getting sick of this type of answer, but it's the biggest thing in my life right now.

27. What did you want and not get?
I can't think of anything. Other than that million dollar winning lottery ticket.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
I just watched two on DVD that I loved - Hairspray and Waitress.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 38 this year. What did I do? I spent it with J, eating chocolate cake and enjoying a day off from work. I never work on my birthday.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Nothing that I can think of. I had a great year.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
Um, personal fashion concept? Don't make me laugh. I wear pants and comfortable shirts to work, and jeans, t-shirts and sweatshirts at home. :)

32. What kept you sane?
My family, my friends, my animals and of course J.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't fancy celebrities or public figures.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Uh...I don't pay attention to politics, either. :) If it counts, I think the writers should get the money they're looking for, and I can't believe how cheap the networks et al. are being.

35. Who did you miss?
My mother, now and forever.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I don't remember meeting anyone new, really. I'm glad to have gotten the chance to get to know my great-niece and great-nephew a bit more, though. They're adorable kids.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
Sometimes dreams do come true, if you only open yourself up to the possibility.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
When I get home from work,
I wanna wrap myself around you.
I wanna take you and squeeze you
Til the passion starts to rise.

I wanna take you to heaven.
That would make my day complete.

But you and me ain't no movie stars.
What we are is what we are.
We share a bed,
some lovin',
and TV, yeah.
And that's enough for a workin' man.
What I am is what I am.
And I tell you, babe,
well that's enough for me.

Sometimes when you're asleep
and I'm just starin' at the ceiling,
I wanna reach out and touch you,
but you just go on dreamin'.

If I could take you to heaven,
that would make my day complete.

But you and me ain't no movie stars.
What we are is what we are.
We share a bed,
some lovin',
and TV, yeah.
That's enough for a workin' man.
What I am is what I am.
And I tell you, sweetheart
that's just enough for me.

You and me ain't no super stars.
What we are is what we are.
We share a bed,
some popcorn,
and TV, yeah.
And that's enough for a workin' man.
What I am is what I am.
And I tell you, babe,
you're just enough for me.

When I get home from work,
I wanna wrap myself around you.
I like to hold you squeeze you
Til the passion starts to rise.

I wanna take you to heaven.
That would make my day complete.

You and me ain't no movie stars.
What we are is what we are.
We share a bed,
of lovin',
and TV, yeah.
And that's enough for a workin' man.
What I am well that's what I am.
I tell you, baby,
that's just enough for me.

My and J's song - You and Me, by Alice Cooper. It sums us up nicely.

Late Night Posting is a Bad Idea

There is a reason I don't usually write entries on weekends. They're boring! :) I didn't do much today. J and I tried to sleep in, but Willow woke us up, first asking to go out, then asking to go out followed by puking noises. What a fun sound to wake up to on a Sunday morning! So sleeping in didn't really happen. Then we had breakfast (I made him a ham and cheese omelet, which he said he enjoyed - it was only the second real omelet I've ever made)and took our showers, and then we got to work. We managed to have some down time for ourselves (playing the Sims and crocheting for me, watching and listening to football for J), but we also managed to: do the dishes, do three loads of laundry, pick stuff up, take down some of the outside Christmas lights, move some snow fence to cover the corner by the garage, pick up dog poop from the yard and get ready for work tomorrow. If you know me, and you look at that list, you can tell which of us did which of those activities. :)

So it was a quiet day, in which a lot was actually accomplished, so it was nice. And now it's 10:07 at night, and J is in bed, preparing for getting up for work at 4:30, and the dogs and cats are all sleeping, so it is super quiet in here. It's nice. It kind of makes me wish I was still a night owl, so that I could enjoy this quiet every night. Usually I'm in bed by now, though. I would be tonight, if I had to work tomorrow. But I still get two more days off, so going to bed early can wait for Tuesday night.

And suddenly tomorrow is New Year's Eve, and 2007 is almost over. It was a very good year for me, for the most part. I've been more broke than I have been in a very long time, due to some unexpected bills that kind of came one after the other, but I also fell in love, and that love has grown deeper with every passing day. J calls me a sucker, but I call myself lucky. I'll write more about 2007 tomorrow, but for now I just want to say that I am very grateful. My life was so empty, and now it is so full. I have a house full of animals, which can be incredibly hectic, but I love them all. And I have a man who is no more perfect than I am, yet somehow we're perfect together. I make up for his faults, he makes up for mine, and we love each other with the kind of love I used to only read about. I'm incredibly lucky.

And now I've gotten all sappy, so I'll end this here. It is obviously time for me to go to bed. :) Good night!

Sims and Football? Weird

Wow, my Internet is slow tonight. I've been waiting for eight minutes for this page to finish loading, and it's still not all the way there. I'm typing anyway - we'll see if it works.

I was playing the Sims tonight, and I try not to talk about the Sims here, for fear of boring all of you, but this was so freaking funny. I was playing a college student who graduated, and when Sims graduate, they grow up and change into adult clothes. The choice of clothing is completely random and picked by the game. This is what he grew up into:



I started laughing out loud, so much that J was wondering what the heck was going on. I couldn't help laughing, though. Could you?

So today was a nice, quiet day. I got up and took the recycling to the dump, with Bernie as my passenger. Then I came home and played the Sims most of the day, plus vacuuming. I still need to dust, but mostly the house is in good shape, so I feel good about it. Then J got home, and we've been hanging out ever since. He's even got me watching football with him tonight. He HATES the Patriots, and wants them to lose a game this season more than almost anything. Well, the Giants are beating them (so far), and I'm actually halfway paying attention. Am I turning into a football fan? Hmm. I think it's way too soon to say that, but oh man, I'm starting to learn a little bit more about it. It's weird. I'm not saying I'm going to turn all rabid football fan anytime soon, but I just never expected to care at all, and yet here I am, hoping that the Giants win just so the Patriots won't have a chance for that perfect season. I almost don't recognize myself. :)

And okay, it's been eight minutes since I started typing this, and the page still hasn't finished loading. Do I have any shot of getting this post online? Or of ever getting that picture added to the post? I have no idea. Sigh. I need to call my Internet provider - we've been losing connection a lot lately, and now I'm dealing with speeds slower than dial-up, and I have DSL. It's insane.

More Productive

I had a much more productive day today, I'm happy to say. I managed to do a few things around the house, like cleaning the couch cover and blanket and doing the dishes, and I called to order us some fuel oil and I called the dentist's office to clear up a billing mix-up (they billed the insurance I had at a job I left four years ago). And I watched a Netflix movie so that I could send it back (Knocked Up, which was pretty good, surprisingly), and I watched another movie that my sister lent to me (Catch and Release). So, I wasn't quite slug-like today. :)

And I was working on the baby blanket when J got home, so I even managed to do a little bit of work on that. Woo! Of course, the baby was born yesterday, so I'm already late with it. Sigh. I'll get it done soon, though, I swear.

Oh, and the baby is a girl, she's doing fine and so is her Mother, I'm glad to say. And my sister was supposed to e-mail me a picture today, but she didn't. Hmmph.

And now I think I'm off to bed early, because for some reason I'm feeling very tired. So. Night!

Whole Lotta Nothing Going On

I hardly did anything of value today at all. I got up at 7:00 to let the dogs out and in and feed them, and then I went back to bed. :) I stayed there until almost 9:00. When I got up I had a bit of a headache from being in bed too long, but it was so worth it. I loved every minute I spent in that bed this morning. Sleeping in on a Thursday is a very good thing indeed.

Once I got up, I started playing the Sims, and that's what I did all day. Well, I also did two loads of laundry, and I made myself lunch and made omelettes for me and J for dinner, but those are the only productive things I did all day. I didn't even touch the baby blanket that I'm making, and that baby is due on Monday. Yeah. I need to get that done. Sigh. I'll work on it tomorrow.

J worked this morning - he had to be in at 2:30 in the morning. He has the suckiest schedule - I really feel for him. He got home around lunchtime, but of course he went to bed for a while, and then he got up and did some stuff, and then he went to bed again. So I only got to follow him around the house for a few hours. :) I'm only partly kidding with that, too. It's nice to have a day at home to just play the Sims sometimes, but it can also be a lonely kind of thing. So when I have human company (in addition to the canine and feline company that I always have), I tend to want to make the most of it.

Anyway. That's what went on here today, along with a lot of kitty sneezing. Zelda had a cold last week, and she passed it on to Sable, who has it now. I think Gracie might have it, too, but I'm not sure. I'm hoping it doesn't hit all five cats before it is done, and at the same time I'm thankful that kitty colds don't seem to be contagious to anyone other than other cats (or so says the info I've found online). The dogs, J and I should be safe from it. Whew! And the cats don't seem to suffer much - they just sneeze a bit. Not too bad, as colds go.

And now my day of doing nothing is almost over, as I'll be going to bed soon, but first I'm going to watch another episode of Pushing Daisies that was stored on the DVR. Man, I hope they settle that writer's strike soon. The writers deserve more money, and I want my good shows to come back with original episodes.

And that's it from me for now. Good night, everyone!

(Oh, and did I mention that I'm engaged? I did? Oh yeah. :) I'm still getting used to the fact, myself. I keep looking at the ring, surprised that it's there. But at the same time? It looks so right there, like it's belonged there all along.)

So Happy

I'm still kind of reeling at the engagement. It doesn't feel quite real, yet. But somehow, the ring feels totally at home on my finger. :) I'm so happy.

So, I told you about getting engaged, but I didn't tell you the rest of the story, did I? Well, he proposed, and I started to cry, I was so happy. I have waited 38 years for that moment, and I honestly had gotten to a point when I met J that I never thought it was going to happen. I was prepared to be single for the rest of my life. I wasn't happy about it, but I was prepared for it. And then I met him, and I worked through my relationship issues, and we've spent the last year together, getting more and more comfortable with each other, and falling more and more in love. And now my ring is on my finger, as a symbol of that love and our commitment to each other.

It's funny, really - I don't really feel any sort of rush to get married at all - we're going to wait at least a couple of years, and I'm really fine with that. But I wanted this engagement more than I can say. I wanted this physical sign of his love for me, sitting here on my finger, as a sign to the world and to myself that there really is someone who loves me enough to spend the rest of his life with me. I wanted it more than anything. And now it's here. I've cried multiple times in happiness. I keep looking at it when I'm doing other things - driving the car, typing on the computer, washing my hands, playing the Sims - anything and everything.

I'm just so happy to have J in my life. I'm so happy that I found the person who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. I thought it was too late for me, but it wasn't, because here he is. I couldn't be happier.

I just wish my Mom were here to see it.

All I Want for Christmas Is...

J and I exchanged gifts when we got up this morning. My last present contained this:



Nice, right? It's a tacky tree that I helped him pick out at the dollar store. He told me it was for a driver at work. Inside the package with it was an index card that said this: "Stupid, tacky tree. Not what you were expecting, huh? Well why not look in the dryer?!?"

So I go to the bathroom and open the dryer door and find another index card. This one said, "Nothing in here...why not go look at your desk."

As you may have guessed, there was another index card on my desk. This one said "Nothing here either...go back to the bedroom."

There I found this:



And inside the box was this:



Sorry for the bad picture - my camera isn't very good at macro photography. But it's good enough to show you that I am now engaged! :) It was a VERY nice Christmas.

Cookies and Gifts

Merry Christmas Eve!

Today we slept in, as well as the dogs will let us. I wish I could record the sound of Willow's tail in the morning, to share with you. She decides it's time to go outside, and she comes over to my side of the bed and starts wagging her tail. It hits the dresser and then the nightstand, and then the dresser and then the nightstand. Repeat until one of us finally gets out of bed to let the dogs out. :) Silly Willow.

Today was a relaxing one. I baked cookies today - peanut butter blossoms for J and to take to my sister's house tomorrow, and soft gingerbread cookies for me. Yum. I did that and played the Sims a little, and we hung out together. And then this evening we went to Long John Silver's for dinner (a new tradition for us, since we've done it two years in a row) and then to J's Aunt's house for their annual get together. It was fun - he has a nice family. And I got one gift from J - a new wireless mouse for my desktop, which I'm using on my laptop right now, and I love it. And J's Aunt got me a set of sugar cookie scented body stuff - lotion and body wash. It was a nice evening.

And now we're home, and watching A Christmas Story on TV. I love this movie - I can't believe I only discovered it two years ago.

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Eve Eve

What a good day it's been! Today J and I hung around the house and relaxed, and it was so nice. I got some time in for my Sims game - finishing up what I needed for the next update and getting it online. J watched some football (the Dolphins made him sad again, sigh). We tried to watch Superbad, but it was, well, super bad. So we shut it off partway through. Horrible. We're just too old for it, I think. And we just finished watching Scrooged, which I have always enjoyed, and haven't seen in years. And we watched it on a VHS tape! They feel like ancient technology now, somehow - he has to rewind the tape! :)

We opened a couple more presents today, too. :) J thought he knew what one small package was that I had for him, and I knew what a larger package was that he had for me, so we opened them. I got a set of really nice large mixing bowls - I mean, really nice. These things are amazing. I heart them a lot. (Mine are the white ones.) And he got a new pocket knife (which is what he thought it was, so we were both right). I love Christmas.

And mostly we've enjoyed being together all day. I think we enjoy and appreciate each other every day of the year, but it feels especially true when it's almost Christmas.

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. We'll be hanging around the house again in the morning, and we'll be going to his Aunt's house for their annual get together in the evening. And of course, tomorrow night Santa comes and fills our stockings. :) I so love this time of year.

Ornament

J's mother asked all of the family to make an ornament for their family tree this year. I looked up Christmas ornament patterns online and found a site that had a pattern for a crocheted dolphin ornament, holding a wreath. Well, given the fact that J is a Dolphins football fan, that was the one we had to make, and of course in a color close to the Dolphin's blue/green. :) It took me an hour and a half or so to finish, and this is the finished product. Not bad, huh? I think it's cute, anyway. Of course, I got super glue all over my fingers trying to glue the eyes on, but oh well. I didn't glue my fingers together, and I didn't glue the eyes to the tips of my fingers, so I consider it a success.

I was going to stay at work until 5:15 yesterday to finish making up time from going to the dentist on Thursday, but I was ready to get out of there by 3:00, so I said screw it. Forty-five minutes doesn't add up to much money anyway, so whatever. I left at 4:30, on time. :) And now I am on vacation until January 2nd. Woo! I love Christmas break.

I still have to call my sister to see when everything is happening at their house for Christmas. I think we're going to J's parents' house in the morning, so we'll be at Donna's in the afternoon. Which is good - we'll get to see everyone, which is always nice.

And okay, now I'm off. We have cleaning to do and laundry to do and movies to watch. Later, gators!

Important Announcement

I have an important announcement: for the first time in six years - SIX YEARS! - I can chew hard things on the right side of my mouth.

WOO!!!!!!!

It's so exciting, you have no idea. It even makes the pain and torture of the dentist chair worth it. Thanks, dentist, you sadist you!

Also, I'm completely wired right now, and I have no idea why - I haven't even had a soda. So I don't know where it's coming from, but I'm bouncing around in my chair, all full of energy and sick of sitting still. I expect I'll crash somewhere around 1:00, once my belly is full of lunch. :)

Today is also the last day of work for me for the year. Yay! What's even better is that J is supposed to have the next four days off as well, if things don't change, and I hope they don't. I look forward to four days with him, hanging out watching movies for the first couple (we have a lot of Christmas movies to watch) and doing family Christmas stuff on the third and fourth days. It'll be nice. If his schedule doesn't change. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

And once Christmas is over, I will have a bunch of days to stay home with the animals. I'll clean and crochet and most of all I'll play the Sims, and I cannot wait. I know it's horrible that I'm so addicted to a game, but oh man am I ever. I want to get a Christmas update of my legacy out by the 24th. We'll see if I make it. :)

Okay, I'm off to go fold brochures and print pictures for work. Have a great Friday, everyone!

Root Canal Part Two

I was awake this morning just before 5:00, and never got back to sleep, so I went ahead and got up, and was in town quite a bit early for my dentist appointment. Which is fine - better early than late, right?

So I got there and they took me back, and all they had to do was fill the canals of my tooth, so I was hoping to be out of there in half an hour or so. Ha! I am so naive sometimes. I was there for an hour and a half. Sigh. My jaw was killing me by the time they were done, too. They put that black wedge/block thing between my teeth to hold my jaw open, which is fine, except I have a small mouth, and it doesn't open all that far. So they force the left side open enough to put this between then, and then the right side of my jaw gets all achy. Sigh. I really hate going to the dentist. Anyway, by the time he was done filling it, my jaw was screaming, it hurt so bad.

And the filling procedure was way different than I would have expected. Small cones of filling, that he warmed up to melt them, using a little heat device in my mouth - which he managed to burn my lip with at one point. Fun! I wasn't far off when I called him a sadist, I think. Of course, I'm sure he's a very nice guy, and dentists don't deserve to be hated, and blah, blah, blah. All I know is I hate going to see him.


But now it's done, and hopefully my tooth will be fine now. I hope. I really do hope. I don't want to go back again for a very long time. Sigh. Dentists suck.

Timed Entry

I have ten minutes before I'll be in my car starting to head home (well, to the gas station and then home), so let's see how much I can write in the next, what, five minutes? Ready, set, go!

I got into work this morning at 7:00. That should just not be legal. I had to do it, though - I was still making up the time that I lost going to the dentist on Monday. It's not bad enough I get tortured by the dentist, then I also have to make up time at work! All the more reason to hate going. And I get to go back tomorrow morning to have the job finished (sigh), so I'll have at least another hour to make up. Fun! Or not.

(Two minutes down, three to go...)

Last night for some reason Willow was very nice. She usually growls most of the time, especially whenever Rosebud is around, but last night she was actually quiet for most of the evening! It was a Tuesday night miracle. :) She even sniffed Duff all quietly and calmly, and he licked her face! Aww, they're starting to get along! It's only taken, what, five months? Of course, she's always liked Duff - she hates Rosebud, though. Poor Budder. I don't think that relationship is ever getting any better.

(One more minute to go...)

And on that note, since I have nothing to say (49 straight days of updating will do that to a person), I'm going to sign off. I hope you all are having a great week before Christmas!

Dental Haikus

An exercise in
haikus, to explain dental
visit yesterday.

(Oh please do enjoy,
I just can't do prose today
so haikus must do.)

*****

Dear Dentist (sadist)
Why is it so cold in here?
Need to pay for heat

You popped off my crown
And drilled into my tooth roots
Oh I hate dentists

Wedge between my teeth
All in the name of torture
Making my jaw hurt

My mouth fills with spit
Can’t swallow, have to gurgle
Can I go home now?

The drilling is done
But too much time has gone by
Second trip to come

My face numb, I leave
I’m shaking and shivering
From nerves and the cold

I get home to J
The driveway all clear, snowblown
Want kiss, can’t pucker

Dear Dentist (sadist)
Do you hate going to see
Your own dentist too?

Scattered

Yesterday morning when I got up, I let the dogs out and in, scooped the cat litter, fed the dogs and went to give the cats their morning treats, as usual. Well, four of the five cats were happy to have them, but Sable was nowhere to be found. And she is a treat whore, so this was very unusual. I called for her and heard a faint meowing, but couldn't tell where she was. She wasn't in any of the rooms upstairs, she wasn't in the garage - so I went down to the basement, and there she was. Silly kitty! I didn't know how she had gotten down there, since neither J nor I had opened the basement door at all, and then I realized. Saturday morning when I was taking the recycling out to my car so that I could take it to the dump, I left the back door open for a couple of minutes. She must have gotten out into the garage, and then when it got cold, she found her way into the basement. She's at least smart enough not to let herself freeze to death, thank goodness. Sorry for the picture being so dark, but it shows her back where she belongs - inside, where it's comfortable and warm! :)

Once the kitty drama was over, I went into the bathroom, and found that the pipes were frozen. Sigh. The wind was blowing at the bathroom side of the house, and it found the pipes and froze them solid. We had water in the tub, but not in the bathroom or kitchen sinks and not in the toilet. Fun! J went downstairs later with my hair dryer and thawed them out.

He also spent a good amount of time yesterday cleaning the driveway, because of the nor'easter we got. Lovely! I hate winter, I really do. I thanked him by making him filet mignons and mashed potatoes for dinner. Yum. It was very good.

Today is the day that I have to get my root canal. :( I am NOT looking forward to this. I was kind of proud of the fact that I had never had to have one, and now I won't be able to say that anymore. I swear, if I could, I would go back in time and slap the 5 year old me upside the head, and tell her to brush her freaking teeth, already! Because the large fillings and the problems they bring down the road are not worth getting something over on Mom. Geez. Stupid kid, I was.

But in better news, two of the presents I ordered last week are going to be here today, woo! So J, if you get the mail and see a package in there for me, don't get too snoopy. :)

Oh, speaking of presents, I had a book wrapped under our tree for J, and it was KILLING him that he didn't know what it was, so he made me a deal. He got to open his book, and I got to open a CD that he got for me. I said okay, because what's not to love about an early present? I got the new KT Tunstall CD, which I love. Thank you, J! And I think he was happy with his book. :)

And now it's only a week and a day until Christmas, and I only have to work this week, and then I'm on break. Yay! I'm going to enjoy the break. I just wish J were able to be there everyday with me, like he was last year, but of course he'll have to work this year. Oh well. I'll still get to spend a lot of time with him, so it's good. And yes, I am very mushy about our relationship at this time of year. :) I love him, and am happy to have him, and sometimes that spills out. We're lucky to have found each other. And there ends another scattered entry from me. Happy Monday!

Football Fan by Default

I have never been a football fan. In high school when my friends and I would go to the games, it would be to scope out the student population - we walked around the field the whole time for most of the games. I've never followed professional football at all. But now I live with a diehard Dolphins fan, so I've become a Dolphins fan by default. I still don't really understand the game at all, but at least now I know that field goals exist, so I'm getting better. So being a Dolphins fan by default, I've been following the season enough to know that they were reaching the end of the season, and hadn't won a single game. J, the true Dolphins fan in the house, was more and more upset by his team. Every game they would get his hopes up, only to screw up somehow and lose the game. I was sad for him.

And then today came. He was in the basement listening to the game on satellite radio, and I was upstairs playing the Sims and monitoring the score on ESPN's website. The game came right down to the end with the Dolphins in the lead by three, but then the other team tied it up and they went into overtime. And somehow, due to a missed field goal by Baltimore and a great touchdown by Miami, they won. I was so happy for my J.

I have never been as involved in the score of a football game as I was in this one. And they won! Go 'Phins!

Cute Pictures and Other News

The other night when J and I were sitting in the living room, the dogs were having a very hard time with the fact that they are no longer allowed on the futon. So he showed Rosebud and Duff that they could get on the recliner. Of course, there were cats sleeping on the chair at the time, as there almost always are, so much cuteness followed.

Also, Willow and Bernie were sleeping on the same dog bed, which NEVER happens, so I had to take a picture of that, too. :)

So, today was Mabel's funeral. I decided not to go, because I just couldn't face it - it was hard enough facing the calling hours. As a matter of fact, I almost didn't even make it to the calling hours. I left work at Noon yesterday so that I could come home and pick up J, and we could go to the calling hours between 2 and 4. But our Internet was out, and there was supposed to be a technician coming over to fix it, so we were waiting. And waiting, and waiting, because they never showed. J offered to stay here and wait, and I could go alone and then come back to get him. And I didn't want to. I had a bit of a temper tantrum, and then I started to cry, and I realized that I didn't want to go because it was in the same funeral home where my Mother's calling hours and funeral were held, and I hadn't been there since. I kind of couldn't face it. At least not alone. So I called and found out that the technician wasn't going to be coming to the house, so J was able to go with me. And with his help, I made it through. I made it into the building, I made it past Wayne's family, who hasn't been much of a family to me (I'm really glad I never have to see them again, frankly), I made it past the casket (Mabel didn't look like herself at all), I made it through talking to family members that I do like and then I made it back out the door. But only because J was beside me, holding my hand. Thank you, J.

Anyway, so last night my sister called me, and I told her that I wasn't going to the funeral - the calling hours were bad enough, and I don't need anymore closure about her death. And she said that she wasn't going to be able to go, because she is babysitting her grandson (Michelle's son), and there wasn't anyone to watch him during the funeral. So I offered to go over and sit with him so she could go, which I think she was very grateful for. I went over this afternoon, after the quickest Christmas shopping trip through Walmart in recorded history, and I sat on the couch and watched TV and crocheted for an hour and a half while Sammy slept. It was the easiest babysitting job in history. :)

And now I guess I've written enough for one night, so I'm going to say good-bye. Bye!

Duckie and snowflake and visiting hours, yuck

It's a good thing I posted my entry from work yesterday, because the Internet at our house wasn't working, for some reason. I think the modem is broken, I'm not sure. I spent an hour on the phone with the tech guy, only to have him say that he has to send a technician out. They're supposed to be there between 8 and Noon this morning. I hope they can get it fixed - I feel so cut off from the world when I can't jump on the Internet to find who starred in what, or where I know that person in that show from, or whatever.

I will be leaving work early today, to go to Mabel's calling hours. I'm going to go home and pick up J, and then we're going to go, pay our respects, and get the heck out. I hate funeral homes. And I've decided to skip the funeral tomorrow. It's enough that I go to the calling hours, I think. Besides, it's supposed to be snowy all weekend, so I'd rather just stay home, safe and warm in my house. Mabel will understand, I'm sure.

See that picture? The duckie ornament is my first Secret Santa gift of the year. Cute, right? I like it a lot. Oh, and the bell next to it isn't part of it - it's my jingle bell earring, which is being used as a hook to attach it to the snowflake, which is hanging over my desk. The snowflake was a gift, too - we all got them. Cute.

I took some really cute pictures of the critters last night, which were going to be my entry for today, but I forgot to bring my camera with me. D'oh! Oh well. You'll see them tomorrow, assuming they get the Internet working at my house again.

Well, I seem to be talked out. Not very chatty today, huh? Sorry. I'll get more chatty again once this whole calling hours business is over with. I'm just not looking forward to seeing Mabel in the casket, assuming it's open. Sigh. Oh well, I'll live. And tomorrow you'll get a better entry! Or silence, if my Internet isn't fixed. :) Have a good Friday, everyone.

p.s. I hate blogger, sometimes. Why does it completely forget how to do spaces between paragraphs when there is a picture in the post? Why? Why???????

Funerals Schmunerals

I still hadn't heard anything from my sister on when the calling hours and funeral were going to be for Mabel, so I just went online and found her obituary. Her calling hours are tomorrow from 2-4 and 7-9, and the funeral is Saturday at 1:00. But here is the thing. I don't mind going to the calling hours tomorrow afternoon, mostly because I'll have J with me, but I don't want to go to the funeral!!

Does that make me the most horrible person in the world? I mean, she was my step-grandmother, I should go. But I don't want to. I want to just go to Walmart on Saturday morning to get the last of my Christmas shopping done, and then I want to go home and stay there. No funeral. Funerals are bad. I don't want to go.

And even if I force myself to go to the funeral, I'm NOT going to the cemetery afterwards. No thank you very much. Sigh. Why do people have to die? I don't like this, Sam I am. I don't like this at all.

Christmas Mystery

Today I was having lunch with Jen and Jamie, and of course since the holidays are right around the corner, we got talking about gifts. I told them that J told me that most of the gifts he got me won't fit under our small bedroom tree. This comment of course made me all curious about what he might have gotten me, and the realization of that curiosity got me thinking about the mystery of gifts in general. Because to me, that's what makes them special - the mystery.

Think back to when you were a kid. It's Christmas Eve, and you're so excited about the next day you can hardly stand it. It's the one night of the year that your parents can get you to go to bed early without your putting up a fight. You WANT to go to bed early, because Santa won't come until you're asleep. So you go to bed, and you lay there with your sheet pulled up to your chin, and you squeeze your eyes tightly together, and you wait for sleep to come. In your head you start imagining all of the things that could be waiting for you under the tree the next morning. From the small things like new toy trucks and Matchbox cars to large things like new bicycles or sleds or doll houses. Every year there was one present you particularly wanted, and you might even go to sleep that night praying for it. "Please, God, let Santa bring me that shiny red bike with the banana seat and the handlebar streamers. Oh, and if it has a basket with a flower on the front, that would be pretty cool, too. Oh! And a horn! Yeah, that would be neat."

The next morning, you're awake hours before the sun is due to come up. You look over at your clock, and it's only 4:30. You know if you go into your parents' room before 5:00, they'll kill you. So you either continue to lay there, wide awake now and about to bust with the anticipation of all of the gifts that are surely waiting for you under the tree, or, if you're a little less well behaved than I was, you sneak out to look at all of the presents, and find all of the ones that are for you. You lift them up and you feel them and you shake them, and you make guesses as to what they might hold. You put them back down without opening them, because you really don't want your parents to kill you on Christmas morning, but the suspense is killing you. Finally, 5:00 comes, and you can't take it any longer, so you sneak into your parents' room. What you don't know is that your poor parents were probably up until 3:00 in the morning putting stuff together, but even if you knew, you wouldn't care. You want to open stuff up! So you wake them. They look at you through bleary eyes, and tell you that okay, we can go open gifts now.

And then there it is - the moment you have been waiting for ever since your parents started shopping and being good for Santa became an important thing. You get to open all of your gifts! The array of shiny wrapped packages in front of you is almost overwhelming. You pick the one you think might be your most anticipated gift, and you tear into that one first (unless your parents make you wait on that one, like mine did). Before you know it, you have a pile of ripped up wrapping paper next to you, along with your pile of gifts. You ignore the clothes and practical gifts, and start playing with your toys, zipping from one to another, not even sure what to play with first.

For you, the holiday is now pretty much over. Christmas dinner doesn't really mean anything to you - for you, it was all about the gifts. And why? Because of the mystery! Those packages could have held the secrets to the universe, they had so much potential.

I went through a phase as a kid when I snooped and tried to find out what all of my gifts were before the big day, but then I figured it out. You have to make the anticipation last. If there's no mystery, the day is just another one, only with a lot of faked excitment thrown in. Christmas gifts are all about the mystery, baby. And I'm going to enjoy the mystery of my gifts as much as I can between now and December 25th. :) But now that I'm an adult, I also get to try to build the mystery about what I got for other people. It brings a whole new level of enjoyment to the mystery of Christmas.