I still hadn't heard anything from my sister on when the calling hours and funeral were going to be for Mabel, so I just went online and found her obituary. Her calling hours are tomorrow from 2-4 and 7-9, and the funeral is Saturday at 1:00. But here is the thing. I don't mind going to the calling hours tomorrow afternoon, mostly because I'll have J with me, but I don't want to go to the funeral!!
Does that make me the most horrible person in the world? I mean, she was my step-grandmother, I should go. But I don't want to. I want to just go to Walmart on Saturday morning to get the last of my Christmas shopping done, and then I want to go home and stay there. No funeral. Funerals are bad. I don't want to go.
And even if I force myself to go to the funeral, I'm NOT going to the cemetery afterwards. No thank you very much. Sigh. Why do people have to die? I don't like this, Sam I am. I don't like this at all.
Less noise, more me
1 week ago
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2 comments:
It doesn't make you a bad person! What you had with Mabel will not be diminished by not attending. Do what feels right for you. All the rituals are for the living more than anything.
I personally don't go to wakes, funerals etc.. I'm sure my family has had a field day about that, but it just isn't the way I honor my memories of loved ones who have passed away.
Cathy
Thank you, Cathy! That means a lot to me, to hear that. I really am thinking I'll skip the funeral, and just zip in and out of the calling hours tomorrow. If J were off and went with me, it might not be so bad, but he'll be at work, and ugh. I think I am going to stay home.
Thanks. :)
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